JieYim just have to admit that she is plainly just faster at posting bad stuff and unhappy things as compared to the good and happy ones...
Lets recap... for the first time, someone around me passed away was 25th September 2008. i dont really know how to cry... it just weird when the funeral came to and end and you reaslise that whatever happened is for real and that you no longer have a grandma... and i still remember visiting my grandmother, she was still ok and talking about discharging although things she said dont really make sense as usual... just like a kid... and my dad lost his mother like that...
then come the next that was a shock was somewhere near the end of december, really near to new year, i lost an aunt, my mum's eldest sister... not someone close as she stayed real far and at that point of time, i have more than enough trouble on hand for me to handle than to be there for my mother... i still remember visiting my aunt in the hospital... she was alright then...
then come the next, after 52 days from my aunt's departure, my grandpa left... my mother lost her father and i lost my only grandparent left. i dint feel like crying at all during those few days and like before, until things are about to come to an end, i realise how sad my mother was... i never see her cry so badly before... i still remember how badly she cried then..
and now, yesterday? in less than 14 days, to be exact, 11 days, my mother lost her brother to heart attack... i think my mother is crying in bed now... thinking about whatever that happened the past few months...
i think she will cry again on wed... he was the one closer to her, other than her younger sister... the brother whom she stayed with before getting married...
maybe i should be thankful that there was someone there beside him to pull the handbrake of the car when he collapse... maybe it is all arranged and fated... with all the sufferings coming to an end...
even my mother's cousins feel the pain... i saw the tear in their eyes when they told me how he passed away... i miss their smiles suddenly...
i am tired.
