.::maybe it is good to not have friends?::.

~*i seriously need a slap*~
~*someone please*~
~*but still today is a better day than yesterday*~

hmm...sometimes not thinking is really better... sometimes i am just thinking...maybe one will do better off without friends?or rather without close friends... you will then not to spend much time in trying to handle the friendship...for fear that any bad thing can happen or for fear that one day that friend might leave you...

there are just some things that are not within control... legs and brains and mouth and every other small little things are on your friend, not on you...so you cant control... so no point brooding over the same thing again and again... but still... i cant control... so do you think i deseve a slap?

things are just easier said than done...

to me... i know i demand alot from friends... so much that i think i am a monster or something.. maybe i am related to RAR RAR RAT... do your know he can turn into a MONSTER MOUSE when he hock up?

that is the reason why the very first friendship in nan hua end...so long... i find it so sad to end it... but still i am a leo... i cant accept being lead around then...

no trust...3 is a crowd...it is hard to maintain a friendship that involve 3 people... cause it is just so hard to make sure that no one is left out... it is saddening to see 2 whispering and you not knowing anything...

things are just so expected... never expect him to give it a damn anyway... he never... or should i say hardly? he is not that bad afterall...

i feel as though i am using my horoscope as an excuse for behaving the way i am... do i have the rights to that? i am already getting confused...

i want to be recognised... scary ah me...? till now i am just thinking that i did things for nothing... he never seem to care... to him...things are just nothing... nothing BIG...

i never liked being wronged... i never like being kept in the dark... i think these are the only 2 things that i cant stand... but he never know... maybe he did... but he never see it as something BIG...

how many actually know?of those who know, how many actually believe me? i am stuck to this f*cking thing ever since the day i happen and don't know which clever idiots think i was the one...got mouth like don't have like that... no one involve knew who did it... i cant say... i can never say it...

stop saying i never ask... feel like slapping your face... aiya... i kapo la...

try pressing you rwarm face to someone's cold butt... does it feel nice? i hate that feeling... and i will hardly give myself a chance to feel that feeling...

i am really a monster... i cant remember anything that he had done fo me before... i am stuck in my own world... world where i am the best...i know that... slap me to wake me please...

everyone changes... i cant stop that... my fault for being away for long... maybe...

let things be over soon... i never like talking to them anymore... dont like the feeling...

ARGH!!! get out... i feel like screaming at people's face now... please...someone...

to youu: i am starting to wonder whether what youu are doing are worth it... things just seem so endless and unpredictable...

to you: you didnt get anything... you just continued with the way you do your own things... somethings that you didnt realised hit the start button and i start the whole process again...thinking about the same lame thing again... knowing the outcome even before it start but i cant control... like i say, it is never anything BIG to you... you are just concern with you,yourself,yours and still you... the topic and the listener... let things end soon please...

]]doubt the you will be reading this anyway...as if he will notice the blog... as if he will notice the change in nickname... as if he care... as ifhe think it is something BIG...[[

school starting and so many thousand million things undone... omg...i think i cant make it... have to jiayou... C=

~*let things end soon*~
~*stop saying the same thing you*~
~*enjoy life youu*~
~*stop thinking JIEYIM!!!*~