Monday, August 01, 2005

.::maybe it is crap, but it matters::.

~*why are things changing again?*~
~*what am i thinking?*~
~*should it be the last?*~

life is fun... real fun during NDp...but come to think of it, there is no more practice until the actual day le... i will miss it...

didnt know why i joined ndp in the first place... i think i joined for fun... but all i can say i totally enjoy the experience... and the company... maybe not the food... but definitely all those nice friends not just people around me now but also those from other dance groups... haha... we actually stood there and comment on a lady with extremely short skirt... so short the we can see what is under those skirt... mind you ... that lady is FAT... haha...

nice to know new friends... ahaha... they are cool people...

anyway... thanks to that army guy, CK... haha... i think without him we will die... haha... he is the one in charge of centre stage dancers... he brought us food and stuff lah... haha...

that guy acting as stamford raffles stood next to me on preview that day lah... lol.. darn funny... changed so many partner since the first day... keep changing position somemore...

haha...

haix... should i get involved? i know it is time to stop... but it is just so tempting... to work with professionals, in a total new place... that is damn cool... but i know i would not be able to cope... cause the trainings just let me reach home very late... the next day i will die...

haix... see how things goes...


]]hope

]]is something that someone gives you

]]the greater the hope

]]the greater the disappointment

]]so you tell yourself

]]dont accept the hope given to you

]]you appeared like you didnt accept

]]but deep down

]]you know you did

]]how bad does that feels?

]]you never know

]]until one day you felt the disappointment

]]then you realise that...

]]ever since the day he talk to you

]]ever since the day he is good to you

]]ever since the day he is nice to you

]]ever since the day he gives you hope

]]you have accepted everything

]]everything that comes along with him

]]his entry into your life

]]you know everything makes a difference

]]you know he make a difference

]]you thought everythings will be different

]]you choose to hold on

]]he continues

]]giving hope without realising that he is

]]you continue

]]accepting without appearing that you are

]]maybe without realising you are

]]you are disappointed again

]]disappointed not just due to lost of hope

]]but also disappointed with your failure

]]failure to control yourself

]]your mind

]]your thinking

]]your actions

]]your words

]]your heart

]]but even when that day comes

]]you continue

]]until one day

]]when he realise he is giving hope

]]and he stop

]]then you will stop

]]the hope that he gave me

]]now or future

]]i dont know how long

]]one thing for sure

]]i will only keep accepting and hoping

]]until one day he stop

]]i yearn for that day to come

]]not because i yearn for disappointment

]]but because i yearn for what comes after that

]]a better life

]]a new life


#what is this?

#just some thoughts

#thoughts that played around with hope

#resulting in disappointment

#those 2 words are part of life

#just like how important water is

#cause it is just part of life

#just like waiting

#everyone is born to wait

#whole life

#for the ultimate thing

#death

#departure to eternity

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