Saturday, July 23, 2005

.::Happy birthday to me... don't cry girl::.

~*i never really know*~
~*why cant you understand?*~
~*i thought you understood*~
~*until you said those words again*~

my father asked me why people give me shirt... i say tomorrow my birthday... then he say... so tomorrow what time come home? i say 11plus... then he said something that makes me feel that he think i am staying out late purposely... then i said i will behome at around 11 plus for the second time and he said... 'don't forget what you promised me'... i thought he wouldnot say those words again... but he did...

am i suppose to feelsad or angry or something else?... it has been 3 years since i last celebrate my birthday with my family... and these three years i only got one cake... or should i say for the past few years... i only have one cake... i choose to not have cake and have pizza instead in the past... but recent years, i yearn for cake but i no longer seems to have time for it... i remember how i spent my last few birthdays...

2003, SYF is on the 24 july... so on 23 july i amsuppose to sleep early... i slept at around 8 or 9... there goes my birthday...

2004, Cultural Potpourri is on the 24 july and i am also suppose to rest early on the 23 july... so there goes my birthday too...

this year... tomorrow is NDP... i will be out at noon and only reach home at around 11plus... i want to spend it with my family... but... will it be the same next year?

i dont know why am i suddenly so sad again... i know my friends are with me... i know... i am suppose to try to be happy and smile more often...

maybe it is really time for me to let go of everything... but i cant...

haix... let it be... look on the bright side... i have fireworks for my birthday tomorrow?!

haha...whatever... it is not funny at all... if it is... i would not be sad now...

~*i thought he understand*~
~*but he don't...*~
~*if he does, he would not say those words AGAIN*~

No comments: