.::suicide::.

~*something that i think i know*~
~*something quite random*~
~*yet something quite interesting*~
[lazy to do research though]

okay! people, see the topic? or rather, see the title?

please, before your continue to wonder why is it SUICIDE and start to get worry whether this person here is having suicidal thoughts, i am here to assure you that most of the things in my life are ok and here i am to tell you something that i think i know and something that people should not do or even think about in life.

there is just so many things going on in life... you get all stressed up, not knowing what to do next. but here is something.. no matter what happens, the one who have the thoughts of commiting suicide or actually tried it, is someone stupid, silly, coward and ultimately selfish...

when you are in this world, you will hardly have the chance to know how much you affect others.. you will hardly have the chance to realise how important you are to others. cause human are like that. they only know how to treasure when they lose something.

here is the thing.. if one day, you felt like the whole world has given up on you, and have this thought of committing suicide, then you are WRONG.. totally wrong... cause i believe, of all the millions of people around the world, there will be someone who cares about you. just the fact that you do not have idea about it.

human are like that. they usually do not choose to let their concerns and love be coming out of their mouth every now and then. cause in the long run, they would not sound sincere anymore.

so always believe that not the whole world and not everyone had gave up on you and someone out there will always be there to support you, so there is no reason for you to actually commit suicide and give up on yourself.

some people felt way too heavy... they felt like they had the whole world on their shoulders... so tired and heavy and sick of it that they think maybe it will be a good idea to give up. leave this world and wouldn't the whole world shine when there is nothing on your shoulders?

that is just what some people think... they believe that life on the other side of the world is carefree and much happier than here on Earth.. although some do not believe that the other side of the world exist, they just remember and look forwar to the relief that they will enjoy when they leave Earth...

so by nature human are selfish ah? they think for themselves... did they spare a thought for the others around them? it is an undeniable fact that all our lives are interlinked... linked up and without you or just the absence of anyone else, i believe that something in life will be different. you may not be standing here, you may not be reading this, you may not be enjoying the happy things in your life, and also many many more... you never know how much others contribute to your life or how much they affects yours..

all the more, you would not know how much effects you have on others.. you never know how a smile on your face may make someone's day, you never know how sad or bad you sound can make someone cry, you never know how stressed up you sound can make someone worried for one whole day. all these.

it only goes to show that you are affecting someone out there and your departure will also affect them greatly.

how irresponsible is that? just because you are sad or stressed or tired, you choose to die. you leave the whole world that used to be on your shoulders to someone close, not leaving them with a choice to decide if they want the world on theirs. cause they just do not have a choice.

the moment you left, the world need to be held up by someone. so the one close and your loved ones is the next to suffer...

the whole world is heavy, to you. to them, not only do they have the whole world there, they have to face the fact that you are not there. some will have to face the guilt and they start to blame themselves for not being better to you, some will also have to face the world with a smile though you have left, cause there will always be someone out there who is even more sad than they are.

yet, there is something common that is added on to their burden. they have to get used to you not in their life. some may just have to spend their remaining days alone, without you.

yes, ALONE, some may just realise that you are so important and unique that no one can replace you in their life that they choose to hide themselves in their shells...

get the idea of how much one's departure can affects others and how selfish it actually is?

if you dont, maybe you should start to wonder, why are you so silly and stupid? now, lets think of the way to die or rather, commit suicide... you can choose to jump down from the building? die from overdose of drugs or sleeping pills? cut yourself at your wrist to let you bleed to death? ok... there are just many many ways to die isnt it? so how do you choose to die?

i think if you are someone advanturous and couragous, maybe you can choose to jump from the building.. you can enjoy that free fall for that few seconds before death... i think free fall is something real nice and great.

if you are someone who like to pass away peacefully, and beautifully also, maybe you can choose to die from overdose of pills... it is peaceful... overdose of sleeping pills will make you sleepy first and tata, you die in your sleep...

if you are someone indecisive and not sure whether you should die or not, maybe you can choose to cut yourself... cut and when you are nearer and nearer to death, if you regret, you can faster get help and stop bleeding and stuff like that...

now, i think you still dont know what is so silly about all these... you have the courage to end whatever happy things that you have in your life and yet you do not have the courage to face the stress that you are facing? no courage to make new friends? no courage to start anew? no courage to search for solutions to whatever problems that is in life?

you have the courage to end whatever that you have in the world... maybe at that point, you only remember the bad things in life, but sure there is someone or something out there that will make you feel like holding back and staying on... will you bear to leave your loved ones? bear to leave those that played a big part in your life?

i can be sad, i mean, i am those kind of people who remember only sad things but please, even i dont think about death, i dont have any idea why there can be someone out there who will think about death... there are just someone out there who is facing worse problems than you are.

if everyone thinks about committing suicide when they face problems, then wouldn't this be an evil cycle? someone choose to die, then the people around that person will be so sad about his death, then they may blame themselves for not giving them enough attention to prevent all this from happening, then they may start to realise and link that up to all the other problems that they have in life... and thats it... they may also choose to die. then thats gone... more and more people will be sad and more and more people will commit suicide...

please, all that make sense... so it is stupid cause human race will just face extinction after that... it is possible...

so... why think of suicide? sometimes it is understandable that the bad things always outweigh the good ones, but isnt the bad ones that tells you that good things are actually good things?

sometimes things just dont go the right way, but it is problems that make life so life? isnt it? haas...

thats all folks... and please.. i am really ok... the above content once made a friend cry when she talked to me about committing suicide... so... nothing really great, but i think these are one of those things that i am proud of myself de le...

i did think of committing suicide before... whenever my parents quarrel because of me or because of something stupid that i say... would it be good if i am not there? there wouldn't be so many problems... my mother can leave my dad, my dad can go find the one that he really have feelings for?

nevermind... i just hope that these things dont happen again... but still, thats life isnt it?

`a changed person
`i was shocked by the reply
`no longer the one that i know
`she changed
`that is life
`people change

~*smiles*~
~*give me a happy tomorrow*~
~* C= *~